love life

Goodbyes

We turn a new leaf
We ache all over from the changes we’ve embraced
We know what we must now do
We brace ourselves for what lies ahead
We move on
We have no pity, we feel no remorse
We see where the road ahead is going to bend
We know we must follow its course
We sense the struggle between two evils
We must soon let go of the other
We choose the pain of change over the pain of loss
We read the handwriting on the wall
We must now follow our dreams even if it takes us far apart
We cannot stop this river of tears
We know it is time to say goodbye

A WORD FOR THE WISE, A KIND WORD FROM MOI

“Promise Yourself”

To be so strong that nothing
can disturb your peace of mind.
To talk health, happiness, and prosperity
to every person you meet.

To make all your friends feel
that there is something in them
To look at the sunny side of everything
and make your optimism come true.

To think only the best, to work only for the best,
and to expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others
as you are about your own.

To forget the mistakes of the past
and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
To wear a cheerful countenance at all times
and give every living creature you meet a smile.

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself
that you have no time to criticize others.
To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear,
and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world,
not in loud words but great deeds.
To live in faith that the whole world is on your side
so long as you are true to the best that is in you.”
― Christian D. Larson

Life is beautiful

5 DISCOVERIES YOU WILL MAKE ON YOUR LIFE’S JOURNEY


A hero is born among a hundred, a wise man is found among a thousand, but an accomplished one might not be found even among a hundred thousand men. – Plato


1. There is always an extra mile, an extra push

Never think for once in your life that being mediocre has got its advantages. Maybe it does. In that case you will live a quiet meaningless life with not a single bother. You will spend most of your days a spectator, hardly a commentator because that would require a ginormous dose of gusto. But of course that isn’t in your plan. You may be thinking though, that well I am not Oprah, I cannot stand before a crowd and speak. Who says that’s what being a hero is all about? Who says it’s about trying to be someone else? Heroism is found within us. We become heroes when we realize that we matter in the world and in our own little way begin to make that impression on every soul we meet. We spread our pixie dust everywhere we go, we lift a dark cloud and leave behind some laughter, a soft touch, a big hug. We become wise when we embrace the joy of living with zest and with a niggling compulsion to be the soprano in every day’s symphony. This is a fact of life, that heroes and the wise can be spotted among a thousand. But the one who has gone the extra mile to hone her skills, and harness her innate power, is so hard to find. And isn’t it so, that the nurse in the small clinic downtown is known by her patients as one-in-a-million. And the teacher in the local school with broken windows, will always remain the favorite and most loved by her poor pupils, she is to them more than gold, a one-of-a-kind. And the single mum whose kids at Christmas would always inscribe in the card greatest-mum-ever. What is your purpose, what is your reason for being, what is your high calling? Is it to merely drift through life and bob at every opinion that wings its way through the air? Is it to be uninspired neither by sunshine or by rain? Is it to exude a lackluster vibe and be hidden from the stars above? Can you begin to discover the beauty muddled in disorder and find peace in chaos? Can you begin to make sense of your dilemmas? Can you find within you the courage, to piece together an image worthy of praise, with the fragments from your misfortune? Can you become a one-of-a-kind? Will you go that extra mile and be the one in one hundred thousand? Not the spectator.


You will learn as you get older, that the rules are made to be broken. Be bold enough to live life on your terms and never, ever apologize for it. Mandy Hale


2. Rules are meant to be broken

Be unstoppable. Be brave. Be bold. As you evolve and your muscles toughen, you will begin to appreciate your journey more and love yourself even better. At every milestone you will realize how much you have grown, how much you have learnt and how lonely you have sojourned. You realize that indeed you have taken the road less traveled and even though it hasn’t been easy it’s been worth it. You have chosen the path that is uniquely yours and uniquely you. You have overcome the urge to trim off the very shoots that give you zing. You have embraced your quirkiness and in it you have discovered your greatest potential and now with it you will impact the world with wonder. But first you must travel this road, this rarely beaten path where the rules that exist are the ones you have chosen and designed, suitable for you and tolerable only by your quirkiness. You will learn this fact of life, first to be the unbearable pain and fear of being estranged, then later as an incredible reward; the joys of imperfections and the beauty of idiosyncrasies.


You will find your voice in so many places, it doesn’t mean you are insane, it only means that deep down, you recognize who you are and soon you will become at peace with that image. It means you are growing and are mastering your rhythm


3. You must make the effort to find yourself first, then everything else follows

As you journey through life you will see many wonders and creations that make you dance within. A line of thought, a song, a whisper. When you hear them, your heart leaps. In your search for yourself and what you love, you will meet many people, different origins and with different values yet something inside of them is recognizable to you. Something they say or do is familiar, like a faint memory, something in the way they interpret the world, aligns with something deep inside of you. In the myriad of hues, you find and choose the textures and patterns that are uniquely you and reflect your deepest desires. In the cacophony of tunes, you can single out the notes and tempos that resonate with you. In the midst of the dissonance, you find melody that only you can relate to the world. And within a jungle of views and values, from little pieces collected over time, you find rhythm, in it all there is concordance. As the puzzle assembles together, you begin to find yourself, your image is clearer, your voice is fine-tuned and your identity is certain. You have become a true citizen of the world. You have mastered your rhythm, now you can sing your song with audaciousness and grace. You have taken your place in the world.


You will learn that true love is not a strong, fiery, impetuous passion but on the contrary, an element calm and deep. It looks beyond mere externals, and is attracted by qualities alone. – Ellen G. White


4. Your perspective about love will continue to evolve

A woman will discover love in the most awkward place, in the most unusual person, at the most unexpected time, and in the most defining moments of her life. If her life weren’t a defining moment at the time of falling in love, then finding love at the time, would certainly give it some definiteness. She would experience love in many colors, and many shades. At some point it is a roaring fire, some other time it is a ravaging beast, for some it is like the wind, never knowing where it is going or where it is coming from. For many it is a wild fire, it comes and licks up every ounce of their being. Life is saturated with tragedies and fairytale endings alike, where some have lost their senses, others have made sense of their lives, where some lose their reasoning, others found their paradise. Love is many things to different people, and overtime the wise ones among us have come to the conclusion that our perception of love is probably the last thing on the list. And time and again we will discover as we journey along, that love can be calm, and deep, like still waters running through rocky crevices. That it does after all, have eyes that can see, and it looks beyond the externals to discover emotions, gestures, motives and sensibilities within the person that is about to become lover or foe. True love is a mystery yet. One that will continually awe us for as long as the human race exists.

 


You won’t always get where you intended to go in life, but you will eventually arrive precisely where you need to be. – Marc & Angel


5. You won’t always arrive where you intended, but it would be just fine

If truly this is a journey, then in your hands are a map, and a compass, telling you what turn to take and what bridge to follow. Your destination is new to you, you have never been there before but with the map, you know just how to get there, so you prepare and you begin your journey. You have a picture in your mind’s eye of what this utopia will look like, you have painted one and possible etched it unto a board you carry with you as you journey. You follow the trail as directed by your map, you take each day at a time, you encounter all kinds of hazards and eventualities on the road, you meet a few other travelers, you exchange values and notes. You are making progress, you are persistent, and after what seems like a gazillion miles, you arrive at a certain city, bustling with so much exuberance and the people  there bounced with enthusiasm and optimism. You thought to yourself that perhaps you would camp there a while and then get on your journey, then you realized how you loved this place, somehow everything seemed fine and perfect and in place. You fit in like a cut out rock in the temple walls in Jerusalem. You thought that perhaps, it wouldn’t be so bad after all if you chose to call this place home and then like a Christmas miracle, you are told not to worry your little head over nothing. You discover that this place that you have grown to love is apparently the only existing city along this route. And  that though it can be spotted on the map it certainly isn’t on ground. Far from disappointed, you are overwhelmed with joy, that even though it isn’t like you painted it, you are happy just being there. These sort of adventures will happen many times throughout your life journey. You will have plans like school, canning your masters or your PHD, then somewhere in between, you fall crazily in love, get married and have a set of twins. You set goals to start a business, then a prospective client turns out to be a fantastic boss, you’re hired by the big guns and now you live and work abroad. It wasn’t what you intended but it fits like a glove, you are happy, satisfied, and moving along your course with contentment and joy.

Mysteries

Stop worrying about how it all adds up, keep moving ahead

Everything in life is in perfect order whether you understand it yet or not.  It just takes some time to connect all the dots – Marc & Angel

The only single thing required of you to do for the rest of your life is to remain in pursuit of what makes you happy. Keep your eye on that ball. Never let it go. Hold that image. Everything else will fall in place. All kinds of hazards and problems begin to happen when you begin to take things too seriously and try to understand everything that happens to you and why they are happening. Instead of burning so much energy trying to understand what life is about, what you did wrong to get punished this way, or where you missed a step to have fallen this far and hard to the ground, rather take the time to look around and see how you can get yourself back on track.

You’ve heard the saying, you cannot cheat nature. That statement is so, so, true. Its like cheating to loose weight. You follow the rules according to the books, you diet and exercise and all, and in a few months, you are back and bigger than you once were. What happened? The answer  is simple, you cannot cheat nature. You cannot deal with the outside without dealing first with the inside. You cannot want your body to look good when you haven’t first decided to love your body enough to keep away from junk, late eating, and over eating. The weight loss has got to begin inside first, with you disciplining yourself and controlling your eating. The exercise and diet routine are only extra support to help you reach your goal faster.

It is the same thing with life, we want to get to the top but we don’t want to follow the stair way, we like the elevator, one way ticket, the freeway, no turns, no sharp bends, no snaky roads, no speed bumps. Only speed. Growth like that is premature, what you end up having are weak muscles born out of an inexperienced mind. And since the higher you go, the greater the challenges you face, your inexperience will cause you a premature collapse from your high horses. When you think you can get by with unresolved issues in your car trunk, one day the corpses will bellow so hard, you will be forced to stop and deal with it.

Just as you can’t cheat nature, you cannot cheat the laws of the universe. Whatever goes up must come down. What goes around, comes around. What you put in, is what you get out. What you sow is what you reap. You don’t want to get to your summit with too much baggage. Chances are you may never arrive in the first place, bearing that much load, you tend to crumble beneath the weight. You want to be light as a feather and solid as a rock. You want to be light enough to surmount your obstacles and solid enough to withstand the deadliest storms.

Sometimes life will draw you back a step or two, or a mile or two in the opposite direction, and you will want to fight it, don’t. Let it play out. It is only in hindsight that you will be able to connect the dots. Sometimes in life, the winds will throw you so far from what looked like your horizon, don’t go and smack your head against the wall, look around, there is a very good reason why you are here at this particular point in time. Sometimes in life the waves will rise so high and thunderously above you, and in spite of your reciting the master’s ‘peace be still’ and mustering all the faith that you got, you still would witness with your very eyes, how the waves eventually crash your titanic and send you struggling  for dear life out in the Atlantic, in the middle of nowhere.

Don’t curse God then, and wait for death. Keep believing. If you couldn’t calm the storm, perhaps you cloud try walking on water. And if that doesn’t work out either, be rest assured something will. There is a reason for every season and most of the time, all through history, heroes have only been able to make sense of their dilemmas and tragedies only after they persevered and overcame. Only after they let go and moved on. Only after they went on ahead, where they able to see from hindsight that it all worked out for good in the end. Stop worrying about how it all adds up, keep going on ahead. It all works out in the end.

 

Woman

 

 

FIND WHAT YOU LOVE AND TAME YOUR HORSE

Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die life is a broken-winged bird, that cannot fly – Marc and Angel

Dreams. Isn’t that what we all live for? You see a guy working so hard, killing himself over every dollar he makes just so he can make more. If you are lucky and you get him in a corner, you’ll discover it’s all because of this girl he’s met, she’s stolen his heart, she’s said yes and they’re going to be married. Nothing else matters to him than making her happy. You think to yourself that he’s stupid, that there are better things to kill one’s self over. Really? Better things like what? How else can we rev the engines of our lives if there is nothing driving us, anything?

Believe it or not, even the cold blooded robbers or the assassins have got dreams and they too probably have the girls they love   motivating them to take more lives and break into more homes. They have the city’s law enforcement on their heels, they don’t sleep easy, they are constantly on the run, yet they wouldn’t stop, because there is something driving them. A deep strong desire to be, do and have, that nothing would deter them. My point is, What is your strong desire? I’m not interested in knowing if its love, more money or a house by the beach, my point is there  has to be something driving you. There has to be something keeping you on the move or you’re finished because if you aren’t moving forward, then you’re retreating down hill. If you’re not retreating then worse still you’re on a standstill and standstill is synonymous to extinction.

A stale life is a dead life. If there’s nothing driving you, than you must be driving something, its got to be one of the two. Take a minute and think and ask yourself, why am I here? Here as in the very spot you are while you read this post. What took you there? Where are you going from there? What is the pivot of all your movements? And to what end? Remember, movement is not the same as motion. You could be a rocking chair going nowhere. So think about this a minute; what is your life about? Why do you do the things you do? Take some time to ask yourself some serious questions, and try quitting laughing about others when they talk about what drives them, when they share their dreams or where they hope to be in the next 5 years. Stop making fun of them and calling them names, like dreamer, or joker. If they are jokers for saying something about what they hope to make of their lives, then what does that make you, seeing you probably have none of such aspirations yourself?

Maybe you once had a dream and for some reason, some very, very good reason, you stopped and gave it all up. Don’t be a quitter, quitting can’t make dreams come true, but failing can. A failure can make her dream come true if she keeps trying and never stops believing her dream can be possible. While a quitter can do nothing more but go back to base, and become another has-been. It’s okay to fail, only don’t quit.

Here is how I see it, have a dream, live every moment for the cheer reason that you want to feel life coursing through your veins, because of what you are giving and what you are adding, because of who you are making happy, because of what you love and how it makes you big inside, because of the magic you bring to every moment, because of the colors you add to the world around you.

Life gets boring and painful when every night we go to bed, there is nothing to look forward to. When there is nothing bubbling inside of us, or simmering below the surface, waiting to be birthed, or hatched, when there is no excitement, no energy, no pulse, then there is concurrently no life, no meaning, no essence. Begin believing today that your life is for a reason, a meaning only you can give it. Do not be distracted or swayed by the meanings others have made of their lives, choose to create yours, you can make major leaps in life when you ride the right horse, the one that connects with you. Not someone’s. Find what you love and tame your own horse. There is so much ground ahead awaiting you, awaiting to be conquered by you.

 

Behind me is infinite power, before me is endless possibility, around me is boundless opportunity – Mac Anderson

Cowgirl

The power of gratitude

A   Poem on Gratitude
Be thankful that you don’t already have everything you desire,
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?
Be thankful when you don’t know something
For it gives you the opportunity to learn.
Be thankful for the difficult times.
During those times you grow.
Be thankful for your limitations
Because they give you opportunities for improvement.
Be thankful for each new challenge
Because it will build your strength and character.
Be thankful for your mistakes
They will teach you valuable lessons.
Be thankful when you’re tired and weary
Because it means you’ve made a difference.
It is easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are
also thankful for the setbacks.
GRATITUDE can turn a negative into a positive.
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles
and they can become your blessings.
Author Unknown

 

Gratitude

If you’ve been inspired in any way by this post, kindly share your thoughts in the comment section. If you will like to also share, privately, what you are learning, or have any questions, shoot me an email — citygirl_muse@yahoo.com. XOXO

14 different ways to make your dreams come true

There is no shortage of dreamers, only a shortage of people doing what it takes to make their dreams come true.

1.    Reconnect with your true self and your inner genius:

It is easy to lose sight of who you are after going through a very tough process. I remember being in a near fatal accident in 2008 on my way back to Lagos from Kano. I managed to escape with only a few bruises. I was still terrified by images of the somersaulting bus and everything when, that same night, only a few miles from home, I was mugged and everything I had on me was taken away by two street thugs. A few weeks after, a relationship I believed so much in, fell apart. The accident and the cascading events that followed, shook me so bad, for many months I was a shadow of myself. I would stare blankly into nothing, still in shock over everything that happened to me, things I’d previously only read about in books, about being dumped, about motor accidents and muggers. For a long time I was traumatized. It was almost impossible for me to expect or believe any good about myself. When tragedies hit you, your confusion paints a sudden and false image about who you are and your reality. You don’t have to accept it. You can change it. Deep within you, you know your true self. She is not lost, she’s only hidden beneath the avalanche of circumstances. There are so many voices jabbing away inside your head, you cannot begin to hear yours. You feel lost and the only way to find yourself again is to take away those layers, one at a time. This could be a slow process, of finding your quiet again and getting centered and regaining focus. A slow conscious process of letting go, letting all the weights roll off your back or simply shaking them off. It’s okay to feel a little lost after being rattled by all kinds of experiences, so long as you make the effort to get back to center. Reconnect with your inner genius.

2.    Take a leap of faith:

They must often change, who would be constant in happiness or wisdom.  ~Confucius

Physically as humans, we change daily and so does our minds, and our souls. We are in constant transition and transformation. We are becoming the image that we believe the most — the ultimate picture of what success means to us. We may not shed off feathers or skin as vividly as animals do, but we are changing and we change daily. We tend to accept physical change easier than our inner growth. In fact we mostly neglect out inner growth and focus more on how we look on the outside. So we try to enhance outward beauty and clutter our spaces with stuff. Change is not a bad thing. Change is pleasant even though it can be painful and distressing at times. Accept your little moments of transformation, and dare to be better than you were yesterday. It is that stretch you make, between where you were yesterday and where you could be tomorrow, that becomes the leap of faith. Continue to take that leap and your dreams will equally leap a step closer. Faith is having confidence in what we hope for, and even though we do not physically see it, we are certain it will happen. Keep taking those leaps.

By leaving behind your old self & taking a leap of faith into the unknown, you find out what you are truly capable of becoming.

3.    Stop building walls, start building bridges:

You are a victim of the rules and beliefs you live by.

A wise saying goes, you are confined only by the walls you build yourself. They are your limiting beliefs, they are those sour, sad, unpleasant images hanging all around you, saying to you, “This is how far you get, go no further. There is nothing for you on the other side. This where it all ends for you.” The sad part is you believe those images, and you believe them because you keep reinforcing them with new ones. Every time something doesn’t work out, you go to your wall of famous defeats and hang up a new trophy of failure and you don’t attempt to give life another try. Be determined to pull down those walls that limit you and begin to build bridges into your beautiful unknown. Take your risks and let those images of failure become the granite floors you will tread upon as you pursue your dreams. Never turn your back on life, whatever happens, good or bad, use it as building material for your bridge and move on right ahead. Let every experience you encounter create for you a network of bridges that lead you to your desired destination.

4.    Trust yourself:

Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. – Golda Meir

Stop thinking too much about the steps you are about to take that you end up doing nothing about your life. You flounder because you are not sure the next step  you are about to take is the correct step. Follow your heart, trust your intuition, it’s not always going to be right or genius; but how else can you sharpen your senses if you don’t utilize them? The more you trust your gut, the more correct instructions it would give you. Spend more time doing something about your life than you spend speculating about it. If you don’t trust yourself, there isn’t a chance you will trust even the most reliable sources, or even the wisest of suggestions and advices when they come along. So stop stalling, stop guessing, stop asking too many questions that lead you no way and start doing, start trusting and start acting. The more you trust yourself, the sharper your intuition, and the wiser you become and the happier you will be to live with yourself. Only a centered person can make their dreams come true.

5.    By all means mean what you say:

I try to mean every word I say when I write because what I say in my writing today, is a reflection of who I am now, whilst what I say tomorrow will be a reflection of who I have become. My words are the chronicles of my metamorphosis. A collage of my beautiful imperfections. A tapestry of my life’s revelations as they unfold. Be true to yourself and mean what you say, every word of it. Being true in your conversations will strengthen your values and beliefs and make you more of a reliable source and less a coward. Learn the art of interpreting your true essence and your value systems through the things you talk about, let the image people see of you be the one you have crafted, not a counterfeit. Let it be the person that you are inside and the person that you are becoming. Don’t say one thing and be another. Don’t say something that is in total disagreement with your beliefs simply because it is trending. Stay true to who you are, it is the only way to begin to dream, by letting your true voice be heard.

6.    Forget what you’ve lost and focus on what you’ve learned:

You probably have had great opportunities, that you squandered and misused. You feel terrible about it and most of the time you are depressed because you can’t stop thinking of the great things you could have achieved if only you hadn’t been such an idiot. You feel stupid, silly, foolish. That’s okay. We all do. Every single one of us can tell a sordid story of how we messed things up at some time in our lives. It is the difference between successful people and the ugly has-been. Successful people learn from their mistakes, depressed, dull people can’t stop thinking about what they’ve lost and how sorry they are that they lost a great opportunity in the past. Choosing to learn from experience strengthens you and pushes you a rung higher on the ladder of life. It means you are not looking back or looking down, it means you have your eyes ahead, knowing how not to do things and where not to look. Life is like a big circle of events and everything that has gone around tends to come around. It’s in that second turn of events that all your hard lessons come to play, so that in the places where you stumbled, you now leap. You have grown tougher muscles and greater resilience. Your newly acquired traits now work for you because you have learned your lessons.

7.    Live in the present moment:

Don’t completely waste the season of life you are in now, simply because you want the next one to begin

Don’t be in a hurry to arrive in your tomorrow that you miss out of your today. Today is just as important to your dreams and as a matter of fact, all the time you’ve got. The future is simply a succession of several days. The quality of your future is the dependent on the quality invested in each day. It’s a natural human instinct to want to cram into one day what you should do in a week. It happens to us all. Wisdom comes from knowing that, that isn’t possible, instead do what you can for today and leave the rest. Put into one day what you know your strength can, then do a little extra. The laws that govern our universe always reward the extra mile. When you have done your best and your extra mile, add to both fullness of mind, body and soul. Be fully present, soak in every moment and watch your days mature into a star studded sky with fireworks and balloons. The richness of our lives is generated gradually from the fullness of time savored everyday. To be in so much hurry to begin the next phase of your life, is to escape the goodness of what today holds for you and without that piece of the puzzle, your tomorrow may not be as promising as you expect. Enjoy this moment, and if it is painful circumstance, then let it sink in, lean in to your pain, be fully aware of what you are creating, in good weather and in bad weather and when that building block is fully formed and cast, set it in place and await tomorrow’s opportunity. How do you build the longest wall in the world? One brick at a time.

8.    Be thankful:

Do not take anything for granted, not one smile or one person or one rainbow, or one breath, or one night in your cozy bed.  
~Terri Guillemet

In all things, give thanks for there is good in any situation. A life of gratitude is a life that recognizes that even the worst days of our lives have some virtue in them. Recognizing this and seeking out things to be thankful for everyday puts you in a position of strength and gives you power over the worst of conditions. An attitude of gratitude shifts your focus from the negative and places it on the positive happenings around you. Gratitude is the open door to abundance. Begin to note down at least 3 or 5 things to be thankful for at the end of everyday. Make this a habit and you’ll discover that even on the gloomiest days you will find yourself going to bed lighter and happier. You can never go wrong with gratitude, they are like tiny drops of water that make an ocean. Being thankful for the small seemingly insignificant things opens doors for the bigger things. When you have a set of written goals you want to achieve, having an attitude of gratitude sets into process the laws of attraction in your favor and more and more of the good stuff you expect begin to happen for you. I’ll like to share with you a note on gratitude I’ve had for sometime now:

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life, it turns what we have into enough and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into clarity, problems into gifts, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing, mistakes into important events. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.

It’s not happiness that makes us thankful, but thankfulness that makes us happy. – Marc & Angel

9.    Have a positive self-image:

You can’t do what’s right while you’re telling yourself the wrong things

You must have heard it said many times; you cannot outperform your self-belief and perception of yourself. If you think you can, you can, if you think you can’t, you can’t. A good book to read for more information on negative thinking, is ‘As a man thinketh’ by James Allen. You can have the biggest dreams and the brightest of ideas and you still will not so much as scratch the surface if you don’t think much of yourself and what you can achieve. Anyone can have a big dream but not many think they can achieve their dreams, that is why only a handful of the multitude are truly successful. Another book to look out for is ‘Think and Grow Rich’ by Napoleon Hill. Having a dream is only one side of the coin, believing that you can and letting nothing crush that believe is another ball game all the together. You can be anything you want to be, the key is to realize this and decide that following your dreams can only bring you one thing – true fulfillment. Believe you can and reinforce that belief daily.

10.    Take your chances:

In the end we regret the chances we didn’t take. We wish we took that exam or went back to school. We wish we had accepted the promotion that was going to take us to a new city, we wish had the baby, went on the road trip, loved more, made that call, we wish we walked away when we could. Why do we hide? It is because we are afraid, we are afraid of making mistakes and most times when we’ve made a mistake instead of taking a chance, a step of hope ahead, we make a more dreaded mistake and our lives begin to spiral further into the darkness. We are too afraid to fail so we hide and watch our dreams wither away. You have to take a chance on your dreams, take a chance on hope and trust that even if you fail, you would have at least conquered your fear. A life spent making mistakes is not only more enjoyable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. Take as many chances as you can. The Law of Probability tells us that, if you take enough chances in the direction of your dream, you will eventually hit a bulls eye. The key is to keep taking those chances.

11.    Pave your own unique path:

With great dreams come great responsibilities and part of that responsibility is you being original. You must recognize that, just like stars, we all have our own place in the sky, and we shine differently. What will make you stand out in the world is the very thing that only you is capable of creating. It doesn’t matter how many people are doing the very same thing, the magic you bring is the difference you make and that magic is found in your interpretation of life. Decide to bring your flavor into the mix all the time, not by being overbearing but with your own little contribution. Why do does it seem like everyone who makes it big has a magic touch, well, its because they do have a magic touch and its not just them, you do too. Everyone does, you only have to discover your style, and your method and it doesn’t have to be bizarre for it to be unique, you only have to trust it and love it when you discover what it is. Don’t try to be anyone else but yourself.

12.    Stop wasting your time:

You spend your most productive moments trying to make someone love you, or you spend the entire week talking cheap about other people, what they are not doing right, what they could do better, how the last thing they did was such a downer. You are out most of the time cruising around town and catching fun, in the name of life-is-too-short, for that reason you are having a girls night out every night and yet you are going to be famous one day. You are so certain of this because when you were much younger, you were known for having such a big talent. Stop wasting your time and wake up. Nothing big happens without handwork. Stop believing that crap that someday, whatever will be, will be, the angels have got your back. If you don’t put it in, you can’t get it out, period. So stop wasting your time and get busy. Read up about your profession, follow those who have gone ahead of you, have a set of written goals, have a plan and you’ll do just fine.

13.    Never forget how special you are:

You are one in a million. You have something to offer. There is someone out there waiting for you to awaken so that they too can find themselves. People always need someone to lead them, someone to tell them they can, someone to show them how. And all of our lives we are either of such people, we are either leading or are being led. While you’re looking up to those who inspire you, others are also looking to you for inspiration. You are a beacon to someone or some place. You can make a difference in the very place you find yourself. You are the answer to someone’s questions, you carry the balm that will heal some, a relief to many who are hurting. You are special, believe that you are, it is a good place to start. Your life will begin to change the moment you come to that awareness.

14.    Keep moving forward:

Anyone can feel overwhelmed and give up; it takes a wise person to take compassionate, persistent and committed action every day. – Marc & Angel

This whole dream-come-true business is a daily thing. Let your eyes look straight ahead. When you fall down, the next thing to do is to get up right back again and continue running. If you feel weighed down, take a moment and check yourself, you may be dragging a few weights around, let them go. Anger, pettiness, grudges and lies, will weigh you down and suck out all the energy you need to keep going. There would be slow days, days you will feel you are not doing your best, that’s fine, so long as you keep on the path. Then there will be the days when your energy is at its peak and you can almost feel yourself leap into the air and fly. They are the ups and the downs, and they are normal when chasing your dreams, only never give up. Only those who keep moving forward arrive at the finish.

You can try any of these steps and your life will change. There is a magic attached to intentional learning, what it does is that, the moment you adopt one principle and begin to make it work for you, you automatically embrace the other principles. The reason is this, no one principle exists in isolation, they are all connected. So start anywhere, begin with the one that speaks directly to you and your life will begin to change. You will find that making your dreams come true is not some strange business, that is isolated from the life you already live, the one is linked to the other.

Dreams

 

If you’ve been inspired in any way by this post, kindly share your thoughts in the comment section. If you will like to also share, privately, what you are learning, or have any questions, shoot me an email — citygirl_muse@yahoo.com. XOXO

I am going to make the rest of my life the best of my life

Here is the heartfelt cry of the girl who has decided the mistakes of her yesterdays will not keep her stuck in regrets and the soiled state of had-I-known. Here is the deep longing of the woman who has swallowed the bitter pill of truth, that says, yes I messed up at such and such a time and that’s okay because I can change.

It is the moment of truth for the girl who is done crying over spilt milk and decides right after wiping her face and nursing her wounds, that it is time; time to clean up her mess and move on. It is the voice of a resolute determination and an unshakable stance, that spits in the face of the accuser, saying, “You cannot put me down. I’m going on ahead and you cannot stop me.”

She is looking in the mirror and saying to herself; I may not be proud of my past, I may not be proud of the silly mistakes I’ve made, I may not be proud of the pitfalls I’ve encountered, and all the traps I walked blindly into, I may not be proud of my past choices and how they always resulted in the worse of circumstances, I may not be proud of the previous years but I am going to make the rest of my life the best of my life!

She is in a quiet place, and in deep thought she summons the fragile pieces of her broken dreams, beliefs, value systems and aspirations. With steady hands, she pieces them back together, she will make a lovely collage of these shards and splinters. Like the coat of many colors, she will sew each piece with love, not condemnation, with patience, not anxiety, with gentleness, not brashness, with hope, not fear.

She will remain in that still quiet state of being, where her dreams are safe, where they can recover, where they can breed, where they can blossom. Like a gardener, with diligent hands, she will prune and trim, she will nurture her dreams within the confines of her most delightful thoughts.

And if per chance her thoughts begin to drift to where dreams are snatched and snuffed out, into the dark alleys of doubt, crippling fear and unbelief, she will quickly retrieve them with the crook of the shepherd’s staff, the staff of her strong-will and determination.

She will remain in control. This is her life and she will dress it and grow it. She will cherish the gift of one glorious day after another and with persistence and focus she will tell a new story, plant a new garden, create a new reputation, create a new life.

And when days turn into weeks, and weeks into months, and months into years, her life is a huge blooming victory garden. When her pretty face lights up a room, and her strong voice echoes with power before a great multitude, when her collage of patched dreams becomes a great masterpiece, then the world would say, “Look, there goes a vision…”

They are oblivious of her dark days, the long nights of toil and crafting, of planting and watering, of watching and believing, of pain and of joy all mingled together. They did not see what went on in those quiet places beside still waters. They only see her lit up face, hear her soothing rhetorics, and her graceful gait.

This could be you. This could be your story. It doesn’t matter where you’ve been, where your past has landed you, or if you’ve been washed up unto distant shores, far, far, way from home. You can begin all over, right at the bottom and work your way to the top. You can make the rest of your life the best of your life.

Best smile

If you’ve been inspired in any way by this post, kindly share your thoughts in the comment section. If you will like to also share privately, what you are learning, or have any questions, shoot me an email — citygirl_muse@yahoo.com. XOXO

You are good enough just the way you are

Forget what you’ve lost and focus on what you’ve learned – Marc & Angel


 

You have recently been fired and your morale is hanging on a loose thread, struggling for dear life. You do not know how to respond to those recurring questions over the phone, “Oh aren’t you at work today?” “Are you on leave?” You used to saunter around town with your fine silk suits now you sneak around with a hood and sunglasses.

You have taken the shreds of a single event and woven them nicely into defeat, failure, no-good, final blow, down and out. You have taken the letter of termination and made it into your label, a sticker that boldly reads — this is the best I could ever be. This is all that there is about this diva. The story ends here.

You allow a single detour, determine the stretch of your zeal to continue along the path that leads to true fulfillment. You allow little bumps along the way define the rhythm of your life and you sit slumped over in defeat and shame and regrets of all kinds. Fading away beneath the shadows of what could have been.

How about what you can become? How about what awaits you on the other side of the valley? How about what could be if you reached the summit? How about what you have put in, the time, the energy, the sweat, was it all for a silly self-imposed sticker?

Pain can be a nightmare, and with pain you have two choices. You can choose to wake up learn the lessons pain teaches you about what is missing, what went wrong, and what is needed for you to move on, or you can choose to numb your pain and hide from your reality.

I hope  you choose to learn from your pain, and not run from it. I hope you learn to nurse your wounds, and not lick them in self-pity. I hope you find the courage to look yourself in the mirror and say to yourself, in spite of your circumstances, “I am good enough…”

And indeed you are. You are good enough just the way you are because you can be better from the very spot you find yourself, however downcast you may feel, if only you will find the courage to move on. A drink or two is needed when you feel drained and exhausted from trying, but to sit back and watch life pass you by is to wilt away for lack of enthusiasm and zeal.

If you will only look within, you will find just what you need to take the next step and move on, and the next step is all you need to begin your walk in this new direction. If you will continue to follow your dreams, you will most certainly be pleasantly surprised in the end.


 

Experience is what you get when your life don’t go as planned,
but with a positive attitude you will always be pleasantly surprised – Marc & Angel

I love my life

I will love deeply, I will live bravely, I will matter greatly.

Now I understand why I have been through all that I have been through. Today I thank my past for lessons learned and I appreciate my quest to know, to understand, and to challenge what could be. I realize that my answers have  surfed easily through the most turbulent channels and in the end, I have found myself at the center of myself.

I regard with high esteem my abilities to take risk, to slow down, to pause, so my inner self can catch up with the ‘vivacious and spirited me’. We will now go on long walks by the riverside — we will go where we can run wild, scream, skip and dance with abandon. We will rediscover what we love, what our true desires are and we will rework the checklist.

We will grub up treasured little dainties long forgotten. We will rediscover our core and what makes us happy. We will prioritize, for we must align – spirit, soul, body, we must become one again.

We will henceforth take this journey together, in alignment and in concession. And in doing so I find myself again, whole, not fragmented, at peace, not at war, fine-tuned not confused. I am in harmony and conformity with my inner self. I am complete in thought and in form.

Henceforth, I’ll allow my heart a level of fragility, to allow love, love that can be hurt but not crushed, love that can give but not sucked dry, love that can receive but not drained. Love that will bear all but not trampled upon, love that would go the extra mile but not become the fool. Love that forgives the past, embraces the present and believes in the future. Love that is true today and for a lifetime.

I will allow my heart the liberty to dream, to dare,  to pursue and to aspire. I will stay awake to experience my own pilgrimage, witness my battles, celebrate my victories. After all said and done, I will like to be remembered for living a life that ventured fearlessly even though I was sometimes afraid, a life that conquered in the end after much defeat, a life that braces itself with strength to persist, in spite of the roadblocks it encountered.

I will allow my heart opportunities to matter in this life and hereafter, regardless of how many times it’s been rejected, shut out, ignored. I will try yet again, over and over, till I scale the high walls of resistance towering between me and my grande stage. I will put on my best regalia, and sing with the loudest pitch I can find, until my boisterous performance shatters through my barriers. I will declare my message with pride. I will continue thus until the heavens sway and the angels sing along.

I will love deeply, I will live bravely, I will matter greatly.

Free