– Be Strong, Be brave, Always believe you can be better –
Women need real moments of solitude and self-reflection,
to balance out how much of ourselves we give away – Barbara de Angelis
Always take time out to reflect on your life so you can refuel, receive from yourself and be positively charged to forge ahead. Most women are consumed by responsibilities and expectations, they forget to give to themselves, receive from themselves and love themselves back.
Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry. Gloria Steinem
This is usually the case when a woman finds that the man she is with is not the man she wanted to marry. It takes great faith and wisdom to take a step back and let the man become who you wanted him to be by letting him take up his responsibilities as the man whether or not he is empowered to. Men are wired to grow into manhood through tough and trying situations that prove impossible.
People think at the end of the day that a man is the only answer [to fulfillment].
Actually a job is better for me. Princess Diana
These are the thoughts of the career driven woman, the woman seeking adventure in the board room, the woman seeking first to build an empire where is queen. The woman who is mostly satisfied by what she does with her hands than by what a man’s hands can do to her senses. If this is you, these desires do not make you less a woman, you have only, to put it mildly, delayed gratification. Many would not agree with your choices, but thats okay, people will always have a different opinion. Only be true to your authentic self and always trust your intuition. They are your trusted guidance.
“If you meet a woman of whatever complexion who sails her life with strength and grace and assurance, talk to her! And what you will find is that there has been a suffering, that at some time she has left herself for hanging dead.”
― Sena Jeter Naslund
Just like men, women too are wired to learn wisdom and patience through hardship, heartbreak and disappointments. There’s hardly a woman without a past, and as much as we do not allow the past take preeminence in our lives, we live to learn from it. Our scars are our medals of conquest, of having fought a good fight.
“I am two women: one wants to have all the joy, passion and adventure that life can give me. The other wants to be a slave to routine, to family life, to the things that can be planned and achieved. I’m a housewife and a prostitute, both of us living in the same body and doing battle with each other.” ― Paulo Coelho
Our greatest strengths lie in accepting our weaknesses, conquering our fears and pursuing our dreams. Our struggles are proof that we are human and the strength to take one victorious step after another after every moment of weakness is proof that we indeed have within our selves the power to live as champions at every one point in time of our lives. If you battle, then be rest assured that within you lies the power to overcome. If you don’t overcome however, it is not because you couldn’t, rather you didn’t because you’d rather not. Nothing is beyond us. We are powerful beyond measure.
“She wore her sexuality with an older woman’s ease, and not like an awkward purse,never knowing how to hold it, where to hang it, or when to just put it down.”― Zadie Smith
I find this quote quite interesting because I see it every time in fashion magazines, in fashion police and the ‘dos and don’ts’ corner of lifestyle magazines. You see two women flaunting the same dress, one looks gorgeous, like a greek goddess, and the other looks like, well, to put it mildly, the dress was forced on her and she was pushed onto the red carpet right in front of the camera. Awkward to say the least, never knowing how to work the dress, or where to hang the purse. It all boils down to self-esteem. It is not our physical beauty that attracts others to us, is our inner beauty and the way we carry ourselves that is the magnet that pulls others to us. And we all have had our share of that silly, awkward moment.
“Nobody around here had ever seen a lady beekeeper till her. She liked to tell everybody that women made the best beekeepers, ’cause they have a special ability built into them to love creatures that sting. It comes from years of loving children and husbands.” ― Sue Monk Kidd
I’ll like to think that this quote also explains, in a way, why it seems women struggle to disengage from abuse relationships. It is probably because we believe we have been wired to love the pain, the weapon and the abuser above all else. We simply believe it is the way things should be. The man should cheat and it’s okay, because we cant do anything about it, because it is what men do — they cheat. We feel we must swallow the bitter pill, because it is what women do, we submit and in submission we submit to the lashing by the tongue and the whip. Yes, we are strong, but our strength is meant to build up and not tear down and worse of all, our strength is not meant for tearing down our morale and our self-esteem and self-worth. We must be brave and never be afraid to walk away from any relationship that reduces us from woman to beast.
“Never rearrange your life in order to meet Mr. Darcy half way. If he couldn’t see your worth at the moment you met then he won’t two years later. May the halls of Pemberly be filled with his regrets and your life filled with thankfulness because of this revelation” ― Shannon L. Alder
Many times, a girl will find herself in a situation where she is trying desperately to get the attention of a young man she is attracted to or in love with so to speak. And time and again I’ve witnessed in many occasions the extended persistence of feminine determination, and the disparaging, demeaning responses of the men in question. And for some absurd reason beyond comprehension, she just refuses to accept the bitter truth, that this dude does not see her at all and will not in two years if she kept up with all her gimmicks and parades. Another unsolved mystery when it comes to love and affection. It takes a wise understanding heart to walk away from the one who tolerates you so you can be found by the one who appreciates you.
“What is it about having a period that makes women so bitchy?”… It was an effort, but I said as sweetly as possible, “It isn’t that we’re bitchier, it’s that having a period makes us feel all tired and achy, so we have less tolerance for all the b***s*** we normally SUFFER IN SILENCE.” By the time the sentence ended the sweetness was long gone, my jaw was clenched, and I think my eyes were bugging out. Wyatt took a step back, belatedly looking alarmed.” ― Linda Howard
I believe this quote is quite self explanatory. On a good day, the woman may not mind being the punching bag but when she is having her period, she may not be just as patient. I also will like to believe that a man who truly cares and knows his woman will know where to draw the line and be less of a nuisance whenever it is that time of the month.
“No woman can call herself free until she can choose consciously whether she will or will not be a mother.” ― Margaret Sanger
Life is about making choices and letting those choices mold us afterwards. So choose wisely, be the hero not the victim. Trouble is, most times we are on default mode, autopilot, we just do because it is the tradition, it is the way things are, it is what people do at certain junctions of life. They get a job, they get married, they have kids, then they…well that is what life is all about family and everyone should make one. Fair explanation if you ask me, but how many women are having babies beyond their wishes at a time when they would have worked and built their careers or education for just a little stretch longer before welcoming the lovely bundles of joy? They suffer silently because somehow, babies shouldn’t be contested or planned, at least not when you are married, they should just happen because it is the way the world goes. People marry and then they have babies. To consciously choose whether you will or will not be a mother, permanently or temporarily is as big as choices go and it isn’t something you suddenly make up your mind about after you have sworn for better or worse. It takes two to tango. If you are going to live your life a certain way, don’t put the cart before the horse, don’t wait till you are married before you pull out your workbook for happiness. Happiness is something you work at everyday. So be wise, work at being happy now not after you walk down the aisle.
“When a woman says, ‘I have nothing to wear!’, what she really means is, ‘There’s nothing here for who I’m supposed to be today.” ― Caitlin Moran, How to Be a Woman
As sweet as this statement may sound, it shows that slight lingering inside of us that keeps us looking outside of ourselves to find happiness and contentment. Everything we need, to be who we desire to be, is within us and until we are firmly aligned with our beliefs, our thoughts and our actions, we will always seek for something outside of ourselves to give us the completeness we desire. I have nothing to wear, is a popular complaint of the woman who is not happy with the way her life has turned out and is seeking to make up for it with what mundane things rather than finding inner peace and contentment.
“One life is all we have and we live it as we believe in living it. But to sacrifice what you are and to live without belief, that is a fate more terrible than dying.” ― Jeanne d’Arc
Seek to live your life to the fullest, stop settling for less than you are worth, stop devaluing your potentials and your capabilities. Cease life at every moment and give every challenge your best shot. Be fearless and always throw your best punch, stretch your muscles and grow an inch taller with every feat you overcome. Believe in yourself, believe in what you can become and stay in pursuit of that dream. This life is for those who will live enthusiastically and excitedly, with hope and with determination. Decide today that you are one of such people.