Healing

RAIN ON ME

The past year had me broken in pieces
Torn in many places
Yet He reassures me
That He will heal me
And bind my wounds
That He will shower on me like the winter rains
That He will bathe me,
Like the spring rains that water the earth

– Hosea 6:1-3

Advertisements

What truly matters in the end?

Everything…
Everything matters
Each word spoken and everything done matters
Everything left unsaid and everything left undone
Every transient thought
Every single day
All possible encounters fostered
Every single smile
The compliments paid
Every embrace felt
Every gratitude shared
Every gift given, even the tiniest handshake
Every promise made,
Every flimsy excuse
Every dream dreamed
Even the days that dragged on
And the nights that never seemed to end
The things you meant to do but never came around doing
And the one you did but never meant to
The things we should have done
The things we should have said
And the things we plan to do
The kindness we should have shown
The visit we should have made
Unwarranted procrastinations, and unredeemable opportunities, lost forever
The friend we could have been but failed to become
Family we could have had but were too proud to accept
Places we could have gone but too afraid to dream
The life we could have had but too short-sighted to believe
All of it matters in the end
Because everything is everything
The way we do one thing, is the way we do everything

LET BYGONES BE BYGONES

The past cannot be changed, forgotten, or erased.  It can only be accepted. – Mark & Angel


Your past is one thing for sure; it is your past. It cannot be erased and it cannot be undone. It can only be accepted. No matter how much you try to explain yourself to people, you can never gain peace or satisfaction only a momentarily gain of having made people hear or see your point of view.

The deed has been done the only thing left is here and now. And what are you going to do with it? Are you going to spend it mourning and bitting your finger nails? Or are you going to seize this moment and do the right thing next time life presents you with crossroads?

You are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future. – Mark & Angel

Most of our mistakes happened because we were blinded with self and a deep longing to be in control but we didn’t know that the greatest power we will ever muster is the power to stir ourselves aright. Our ability to take control of our own lives by manning our own decisions is the bravest and most courageous and not trying to control the will of others.

So let bygones be bygones. The best thing you can do to appease the past is to apologize, forgive, and move on. Anything else apart from these would be beating around the bush.

Don’t get stuck trying to fix the past that you miss out on your life in the present. Life is here and now. Live it with all the enthusiasm and positivity you can muster. Selah.


You might not be proud of all the things you’ve done in the past, but that’s okay.  The past is not today. – Mark & Angel

Goodbye

5 LOVE LESSONS THAT CAN GUIDE YOU 5 YEARS AHEAD

Sometimes your eyes need to be washed by your tears so you can see the possibilities in front of you with a clearer vision again.  Don’t settle. – Mark & Angel


1. “Relationships must be chosen wisely.  Don’t rush love.  Wait until you truly find it”: – Take it one step at a time. Take time to reflect too. Sometimes in the frenzy of the moment you do not hear everything that was said or done. It is only when you are alone, that you can put the pieces together. Look out for patterns and red flags. Don’t feel afraid to walk away if don’t like what you’re sensing. Our instincts often never lie. Don’t let your emotions overpower you and don’t deny them either. Only let your head be clear. If he is not your idle man or if he’s beginning to show traits that make you feel the slightest uneasy. Go no further. Wait. There is true love for everyone, sometimes you have to wait longer to find yours.

2. “Don’t let loneliness drive you back into the arms of someone you know you don’t belong with”: – You’ve been with someone before and you know he is all wrong, wrong for you, wrong for your peace of mind, wrong for your life, yet you go back because you need someone. I’ve heard a few whining in that direction, ‘I don’t have anyone else and I need someone…’ If that someone isn’t meant for you, there is no way it is going to get better, only worse. Save yourself from trouble, save your precious time and save your precious heart from ache that can wreck it beyond repair.

3. “Fall in love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely”: – When you are ready for love, you will know. It means you have resolve all your past conflicts, and have let go of past weights of pain, hurt, regrets and are now whole. True harmony with oneself is a platform of strength. Such inner peace can only attract to you equal peace and wholeness. There is not saying you should deny being sometimes lonely, just don’t make that your criteria for getting hooked. Wait till you are ready. A chinese proverb says, when the student is ready, the teacher will appear. Same goes for finding true love, when you seek love from a place of consciousness instead of hypnotizing yourself with self-made assumptions, you attract to yourself exactly the right man for you.

4. “Some relationships and situations just can’t be fixed.  If you try to force them back together, things will only get worse”: — if your relationship is going down hill for the umpteen time stop trying to rescue it by pulling it back uphill with your teeth. Let it go and get a grip of yourself before you do something to hurt yourself badly. Some relationships can’t be helped. But you can be, so save yourself and take care of yourself. Care for your physical body, feed your mind with affirmations about yourself. Don’t stop loving the things that make you special. Get your groove back.

5. “Sometimes it’s about starting over and creating something better.  Strength shows not only in the ability to persist, but in the ability to start over again with a smile on your face and passion in your heart”: – Do yourself a favor and accept that every ending is a new beginning. For every door that closes, somewhere God opens a window. Never give up on life. Never give up on you. Never give up on love. That you’ve had it bad doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist for you. You have to have faith in the impossible and that can only begin to unfold for you the moment you begin to tell yourself it is okay to start over. Life is about endings and beginnings. That is what makes it so exciting. To know that somewhere out there, there is someone who is going to be madly in love with you for you.


P.S. All quotes by Mark & Angel.

Love lessons

3 WAYS TO FREE YOURSELF FROM HURT

Life is too short to hold on to misgivings and fights. Often we find that our hearts are tightened with bitter anguish over hurt that has crushed our hearts with a heavy burden. We are stuck, unable to move o with our lives until we take the first step towards liberty.


1. Be the bravest, be first to apologize: I’ve learned severally through many life experiences that finding the courage to apologize frost is truly liberating. It immediately lifts the dark veil of pride that is separating you from your true peace.

2. Be the strongest, be first to forgive: Genuine apology will always lead to genuine forgiveness even when you are not in the wrong. It immediately frees you form the hurt that once blinded your judgement and you are able to let go finally. You also succeed in telling yourself that the person didn’t know better and that humans a re generally vulnerable.

3. Be the happiest, be first to move on: Move ahead. Don’t store up unpleasant moments in your mind and you must fight the urge to relive any of such. Keep your eyes straight ahead and occupy your thoughts with the newness that is unfolding with your new decision to be free. Don’t hold back from living your life to the fullest because the other party who has refused to let go and is still holding on to claims of injustice. Do not let their negative energy poison your state of tranquility. Be the happiest!


 

The first to apologize is the bravest.  The first to forgive is the strongest.  The first to move forward is the happiest.  Be brave.  Be strong.  Be happy.  Be free. – Mark & Angel

Brave

Brave – 3D Animation. A moving story about bravery and reconciliation…

THE BEST WAY TO MOVE ON IS TO MOVE ON

Yesterday I received a sad email from a very dear friend of mine. She has just broken up with her boyfriend of many years and she is hurting deeply.

I felt her pain too well because I knew exactly what she was going through. I think the saddest part of her email was the part where she explained how anxious she’d suddenly become over changing her apartment and moving to a new place.

I knew that feeling too well. And in a strange way that cut me deeper than the breakup itself. It’s hard enough to walk away from a relationship that has been on for a long time. It’s hardest when the relationship has woven itself into the very fabric of your existence. You begin to feel an overpowering urge to want to change things up with the snap of a finger. You want to change your phone number and your house address. You would even change cities if you could.

Anything to wipe out that memory card clean. The one that once held the minutest detail of you and your ex. Anything to forget he was ever part of you and that at one point in time he was the only thing you could think about and talk about and even cry over.

Anything to forget that once upon a time, he was the center of your life.

I could feel her pain and understand her anxiety because I’d been there before. Thankfully it was a couple of years ago so now I can think more objectively and speak from a place of healing and clarity.

So I replied her email. I told her it was okay to hurt, and to cry and to mourn the relationship as long as she wasn’t hurting herself further by feeling remorse or self-loath or any of the like.

I also tried to make her see that it was okay for her to want to move house and all, but that she must realize that the best move she could ever make was in her mind. The best way to move on is to move on. And it is done mentally, consciously and deliberately with the choices we are making daily not by changing our physical address.

It is all in your mind. You can remain single, confident and happy living in the same apartment, doing the same job and using the same phone line after a very disturbing breakup. Yes, it is possible.

It is also important to have a change of view after a breakup; try new experiences, change your routine and free up a little space within your living quarters. You can even move house, move into a new neighborhood, change jobs or even change cities. Smell the roses, have a new perspective to life and begin to enjoy being single again. This also is possible and as a matter of fact advisable sometimes so you can get your groove on a lot quicker.

Still, unless you have truly moved on in your inner consciousness, and holding no bounds, the latter option would only amount to a perfect finish of a facade while the interior is still a mess.

When shit hits the fan, the first thing to do is to clean up the mess, not buying of a new rug, or painting the walls. That can come later; after you have gone through the pain of taking care of the urgent.

If you are not okay, your new house will never be okay neither will the new job or the new city. If you are not completely over yourself and the breakup, the next step will always be bleak. I do know however, that getting through a breakup can be hardest and longest and that most times, the first instinct is to get away.

I want to trust that whatever decision you make would be the best decision for you, and as you go come through, remember that the most important person right now is you and that you too deserve your love more than anyone else or anything else.

So while you seek answers, remember to be kind with yourself, be gentle and be patient. Take it easy on yourself. You are in it together; you, your conscience and your heart. You all need each other. So be gentle, be reasonable and remember to be affirmative at all times.

Say the kindest words to yourself and call yourself the kindest names. We learn everyday and mostly too from mistakes. Don’t be hard on yourself. Take it easy but make sure you move on.

“FOR IRENE”

breakups

LEAVE A DOOR OPEN

Love doesn’t hurt, expectations do – Pushkaraj Shirke


 

Pain can be a real bitch at times. Especially pain inflicted by someone you love and genuinely care about. The more hurt you bear for the sake of love, the more danger you risk. You are at risk of the inevitable explosion that comes after the cup gets full and then it gets very messy. The broth is spilled on everyone and everything. You are at risk of letting your pain get in the way, it first poisons you, then it poisons the other. If you are familiar with snake bites, you know that poison must be stopped immediately from traveling further through the body fluid of the inflicted. Well, unlike snake bites, what unattended pain does to us is more like slow deadly poison. An emotional wound that isn’t treated becomes infectious and deadly.

Perhaps the easiest way to deal with pain is take your eyes off the offender and set it on their vulnerability, our vulnerability as humans. How we all can be weak, afraid and misguided. How we are easily misunderstood by each other because of our colored perceptions and how we often overreact and only begin to see sense once the milk is spilled. We only feel remorse after we have fully satisfied our urge to damage, mutilate and wreck a havoc. In a way we are like vampires, having a voracious appetite for human blood, easily aroused, then we are like the werewolf, remorseful naked and ashamed once our cravings are gratified.

However when we see and accept our vulnerabilities as humans then we can understand better and act in wisdom other than react out of fear. We can be wise and give some distance, go somewhere to heal. You must heal because you now know that an untreated wound can easily be infected and that it is slow poison in action. Therefore, going away from the scene and from your precious friend isn’t exactly out of disdain but an act of protection, protection for yourself first. It may seem selfish, but selfish is good at this time. Distance is required. You must heal, so that your heart can recover and your mind free of poison. You may want to cease interaction at this time with this person who is acquainted too well with bites and stings. It is for the greater good, both for you and for her. By going away, you may be perceived as unforgiving, hateful and resentful. But you do know deep down, that by that distance, you leave a door open.

 


Pain is a sudden hurt that can’t be escaped. But then I have also learned that because of pain, I can feel the beauty, tenderness, and freedom of healing. Pain feels like a fast stab wound to the heart. But then healing feels like the wind against your face when you are spreading your wings and flying through the air! We may not have wings growing out of our backs, but healing is the closest thing that will give us that wind against our faces.”
― C. JoyBell C.

walking-in-the-rain