“It’s not what you say out of your mouth that determines your life, it’s what you whisper to yourself that has the most power!” ― Robert T. Kiyosaki

There are two groups of people in the world. We encounter them daily. Our concern however is not so much about who these people are than it is about which of the groups we belong in. The first group are those who supposedly boast about everything they are going to become in life, what they would achieve, and how they would turn out better than the expectations of people around them. People who supposedly do not wish them well in life.

While the other group of people are those who somewhat say the very same things but in fewer words and with different inferences and attitude. They are not outrightly gunning to shun anyone so to speak but are rather gunning to create something for themselves in the world. So here are two seemingly similar notions both seeking success but only one group actually makes it in life and you guessed right, the latter are those who actually become what they say they would become.

Why is that so? Weren’t both groups vocal enough about what they wanted? Isn’t that part of the rules of success, to always say what you want? Well, yes and no. I’ll get to the point in a minute. It is not so much what you talk about becoming but what you think of yourself every second of every day. What you are saying to yourself through what you are thinking. Thoughts seldom proceed from the words we say, it is our words that proceed from what we think.

The world we have created is a product of our thinking;
it cannot be changed without changing our thinking. – Albert Einstein

So you have this big dream and you wonder why you are still marking time after what seems like donkey years and you’re wondering why it seems some of your friends have checked off their dream list in the blink of an eye. As you go through your routine, you are wondering and thinking, “What is wrong, with me? Why do I always lag behind? Why do I always do the wrong things and choose the wrong career? Why aren’t I as lucky with jobs? Why does everything fall apart right in the middle of beginning? Why aren’t I as good at anything?”

You are genuinely worried about your life, which is good, but what you fail to realize is that you have said the very somethings to yourself for as long as forever. You may not realize it but you have always ‘thought’ yourself to be not-good-enough, not lucky with jobs, always giving up half way because something always goes wrong.

That has been your self-talk, your thoughts about your potential and that is why they do not correlate with your supposed affirmations. So that even though you have been going on and on about how you are going to conquer the world, deep down you believe that the best you can actually do is conquer your run down kitchen. No matter how optimistic you may sound on the outside, if you do not think optimistically about you in your mind, there is very little positivity you can experience in your life.

No matter where you go or what you do,

you live your entire life within the confines of your head. ~Terry Josephson

Imagine you are out with friends, old schoolmates, or say you are at an alumni dinner of some sort, and everyone is seated around the dinner table catching up on good times had at the university. Remember also, that there are two groups of people  present at this dinner.

Drumroll, conversations kickoff and everyone is chatting away about their lives. Someone makes a gesture about how her homegrown business, a crèche, is going to go global in a few years. As a matter of fact she has just acquired a piece of property which is currently being renovated and once that is done, she plans to move the business from her home into this haven and thereafter triple her revenue by becoming the prime creche in that neighborhood.

Guess what you say to your self, “How laudable. Triple her revenue. Go global. Why can’t people be realistic for heavens sakes. Why do they have to shoot themselves in the leg in the name of being ambitious. I can’t imagine running a business from home and then say in public that I am going global after only 1 year!” Well, guess what, there is no way you would go global even if you had the chance to build the same business for two years from your own living room! You have just shot yourself in the leg! We become what we believe.

The trouble with most people is that they think with their hopes or fears or wishes,
rather than with their minds. ~Will Durant

The evening gradually comes to a close and everyone is made to talk about what their next steps are and where they hope to be when they gathered again in another 12 months. It got to your turn, and with your best smile you talk about this fantastic job you have and all, and how you hope you to begin a small business on the side soon. You go on to reiterate how you are not a believer of closing shop at the office to begin a business, so you’re going to do both side by side.

Everyone applauds you and someone chips in and suggests you consider taking a small loan and offers you a promising package at his bank. “Once you are ready to begin and you think you will like a loan, I’m sure you’ll find something that works for you from all our great offers…” You go, “Oh wow, great idea, ain’t I lucky to be here. Please give me your number…” He reaches for his pocket and pulls out his card, and as you tucked it into your purse, you say to your self “Loan in indeed. What if the business fails, who is going to pay back the loan when that happens…*sigh*”

Brian Tracy says, “You do not get what you say, you get what you expect”. Yet, every time you wonder why your dreams are epileptic. Have you tried asking yourself, “Why do I keep whispering these silly things to myself?” Meanwhile, at every chance you have been given, you have consistently drawn conclusions of failure in your head. You do not realize that it isn’t just about what you say you would do, or what you say you would become, it is about what you believe of your abilities and potentials. It is about what you are thinking, while you’re saying it and after you say it, that is what drives your life. You become what you think about.

You and I are not what we eat; we are what we think. ~Walter Anderson

You think you are not good enough. Each time your girlfriends come around with a new idea, you go, “Hmmm, so you mean this thing can work… Hmmm, seriously I don’t know…I’m not sure it’s for me…” “I’m are not the ambitious type,” that is what you say to console yourself each time you are offered a more lucrative and rewarding job.

You think you can never be better than average. So every time an opportunity comes for another promotion at the office, you join the office gossips to guess who it would be, you never try to ask yourself “Why not me?” You align yourself among the poor majority because every time you se something you would love to have, you are like “These rich people and their fancy toys, or you rich people and your lush lives”. So automatically, you have given yourself a position at the bottom of the ladder.

Never climbing or trying to climb, but always nagging everyone who comes around and dares to rise up the first few rungs. You warn them of the flight up the ladder, how they will suddenly lose their minds from trying, like you’ve given it a try yourself. Nothing is good enough for you. There has to be some danger and some misfortune. No one says life is free of hazards but should we all be locked in for the best parts of our lives because there is a storm out there?

Be less afraid to think the best thoughts about yourself. You have absolutely nothing to lose and everything lovely and beautiful to gain. Like a blooming garden, plant one good thought after another in your mind about yourself and what you can become and watch with delight how your life unfolds. Like the flowers in spring.

I like to think of thoughts as living blossoms borne by the human tree. ~James Douglas


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