And remember, no matter where you go, there you are – Confucius
If you’re going to attend the baby shower, don’t go there if you’re going to leave your spirit and soul in your up-side-down closet. Your friends can see you at the event, with your morphed smiles and monologues but your mind is at home, rummaging the overturned closet your body left behind. If you have decided to spend the weekend at your best friend’s so you can let your hair down and get some sleep, take time off from the crazy 9 to 5 routine, then do just that. Don’t be there in body while your mind is busy running through the folders on your computer, the one you left at your office desk Friday before! Stay in the present moment. You may be wondering what that means. It means simply, don’t be in one place in body whilst your mind goes on a cross-country cruise fixing all the issues you left behind at home, at the office, with the kids, with your ex etc. Do not live perpetually in the past and do not permanently daydream about the future. If that’s your reality then where have you stashed your today, at the Laundromat? You may have heard it said before; the mind exists in the present moment. You bring what is needed to every circumstance and situation of your life. You can either choose to bring light, and brighten the shadows cast by your past or you can escape your current reality by refusing to participate in what is here this moment and now. You can choose to engage in piecing the puzzle together and to find answers or you can give excuses why you can’t. You can choose to be present or absent. It’s up to you.
Get involved. You don’t want to look back on your life and realize that you successfully managed to stay out of it. – Robert Brault
Say you are sitting down on a bench in the park and watching this chain of events happen, one surreal event after another. A few hours later, what seemed like a few hours have actually been days and weeks and years. Then you realize, what a long walk in the park that was and all those events you sat watching gloomily and tiredly had actually been your life. Scary isn’t? Wouldn’t you be in such a frantic frenzy to find out at the end of your life that you successfully managed to stay out it? Have you ever heard the frequent saying, “You don’t want to wake up one day and realize…” Well that is what happens when you elude the nitty-gritty of your existence; when you are present in body but absent in thought. When you simply let things be and tell yourself, “Somehow, it all works out…” well… it certainly does work out, but what essentially happens is that, you are left out of the game and you never have the full detail of how you spent your generous amount of days. Your life is lived in fragments and shards. You become a sad sorely has-been.
It would be really sad as much as scary to suddenly realize that everything you have done and everywhere you have been to wasn’t exactly done consciously, that you were perpetually influenced by someone or something or by the trends. What’s worse is if you can’t even remember why you did those things or why you chose to go to those places. You are completely oblivious to the reasons why you have been such and such a person. You have become the forgetful one among your peers. Never truly listening. Never truly there. You are here but always somewhere else at the same time. No one moment is entirely good enough for you. No one moment is entirely real. If you can relate to this, then it is time you begin to ask the real questions. Everyday when you wake up, try saying to yourself, “This is where I am right now in my life, and this is what I am going to make of it. I am going to be happy being here because I know I can and will make the best out of it. Although I may be here now, it is not where I hope to be, but I will be here anyway because it is only by being here fully that I can find the strength to get there timely and adequately.” It sounds like blabbing but if you give it a try it is sure better than daydreaming your way through life, and it sure beats sulking away in regret of the mistakes of your past. Richard Templar said in ” The Rules of Life”: The past should be a doorway where you go through for only a few minutes not a room where you reside! Same goes to saying your fantasies should energize you to work towards achieving your dreams, not the other part of your bipolar residence. So the next time you are off to an event or thing, remember to take ‘you’ along. Spirit, soul, and body.
Up to a point, a man’s life is shaped by environment, heredity, and movements and changes in the world about him. Then there comes a time when it lies within his grasp to shape the clay of his life into the sort of thing he wishes to be. Only the weak blame parents, their race, their times, lack of good fortune, or the quirks of fate. Everyone has it within his power to say, “This I am today; that I will be tomorrow.” ~Louis L’Amour
There comes a time when YOU, not me, not your mum or your aunt or your boyfriend but you have to come to that place where you grab the clay of your life out of the hands of whoever’s got it and become the potter of your life. Only you can shape it into what you wish, what you want and what you desire. Going to college or university isn’t going to do that for you. Neither are all the fine things in this world. Some of us got it backwards. We have the cart before the horse and we wonder why our life is torn in different directions. We do everything and anything but take responsibility for our actions and what we are becoming as a result. Its time to wake up! Stop being the on looker, or the apprentice, in the workshop that is meant to be your own life; it’s time to resume the prestigious duty of being the potter of your life. Take responsibility. Face your demons. Make those changes. Be fully engaged in the nuances of your days, a day at a time. Choose to bring the bubbly, vibrant energy you need into your everyday. Enjoy the richness of every moment, celebrate your little victories and see how gorgeous and encouraging it all turns out in the end.
Look at it this way; you are either the puppet or the puppeteer. If you are the puppet, then who, or what is puppeteering your life? That’s something to think about.